Thursday 12 June 2014

I went grey overnight last night!!!?

I was called a name yesterday...one that I'd never been called before;

>>>>>>>>>>>>>> A Professor of weight loss<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

Pretty cool huh!?

I instantly grew wild grey hair, a mad moustache and woke up in a white overcoat.

From now on my name shall be ...
                                                             'The mad Fit-proFESSOR'  
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'll hurriedly walk the wild streets of Heywood looking to enrol women in to my TLFRevolution university, where when inside shit gets real.

I'll inject them with some kinda weird purple energy injection.

The side effects will be truly gruesome.

But firstly I'll lock them away for 28 days in a cage to lift weights, eat nutritious foods and feel better about themselves.

I may drip feed them some information at night while they sleep on some crazy, insane science about the body and how to use it so it works for them.

They will be my subjects.

I shall nurture them, assess them, test them and track there progress.
If they show any signs of falling off this horrible experience they will be subject to a a verbal lashing of motivation.

I may inject them with another injection half way through, this time red & full of self esteem.

Once the 28 days is up and my experiment is over I will release them from their cages and send them back into the wild, a stone lighter, feeling buzzing and probably naked.

Some may not want to leave - but they're the sick twisted bitches who I'll thrive off. That's when I'll then turn them into toned, sexy machines who eat scales for breakfast.

Those bitches be crazy y'all

Ian 'the mad fit-proFESSOR' Foran

PS 
In 3 weeks I've created a 40+ strong team of rebellious women who eat scales for breakfast.

Re-formatted TLF training to incorporate weights for faster results.

Weighed, measured, took fat% & assessed from said women.

Individualized all their nutrition.

Made them all feel amazing.

It's Time to go again!

DO you want to enrol in the #tlfrevolution University?

We want 9 women who want to drop at least a stone in 28 days.

Starting next week we're continuing our challenge 'rebellion' for 9 females to drop a combined 140lbs in 28 days.

Be warned there's some shit side effects like increased energy, confidence and having to buy new clothes.

The price is £48

The days are mon,wed & thurs (morning or night)

Head here if you accept the challenge -https://ianforan.wufoo.com/forms/drop-a-stone-in-28-days-challenge/


No comments:

Post a Comment